Rockwood Cinema Review: Blood Freak (1972)

Blood Freak (1972) asks: “Is turkey the gateway drug?”

Gobble Gobble! Happy Thanksgiving Canada. Today in Rockwood Cinema we take a look at Blood Freak (1972), which features sex, drugs, rock and roll and a farm so we figure its fair “game”. Now, first off, this movie is a real turkey, this is not just because it has live turkeys on turkey farm, features a scene where a man eats a cooked turkey entirely to himself (rather selfishly) or that it features a blood thirsty manic with a giant turkey head, but also because it is terrible. Blood Freak (1972), was a movie once rated X because of the offensive violence, however, by today’s standards the only thing it offends is good taste.

Who eats a turkey leg like that? Obviously someone on drugs.

The story follows a biker, Herschell (played by Steve Hawkes), who meets a girl where everybody used to meet before the internet highway, the actual real highway, on the side of the road. With a small verbal exchange and very little convincing Ann persuades Herschell to come with her to a party. Once there, he seems at odds with this hippy environment of free love and drugs. At first he is resilient to the offers of free drugs but he eventually caves to the wiles of Angel, Ann’s sister. Herschell then travels to Angel’s Father’s turkey farm, where he also needs very little convincing to sample their genetically modified turkey meat as a test subject. The scientist’s rationale is that Herschell should trust them, because the government trusts them. Furthermore, that if he has tried recreational drugs, the chemicals couldn’t possibly be less detrimental than those found in their meat products. With that logic, its no wonder he is a scientist. Next, it is unclear if it’s the drugs or the experimental turkey or a combination of the both, but [SPOLER ALERT] the result is he turns into a half turkey / half man. Well, its more like a human body with a turkey head (without giving away all the “stuffing”).

As far as B-movies are concerned, Blood Freak (1972), buys the turkey farm.

Now I don’t know if its the affects of the real-time pot session in the movie (seriously its like a 5 minute scene of them smoking) or the chicken pot pie but there are a lot of WTF moments in this film. The narrator, looking like Vincent Price meets Ron Burgundy, and is shown reading his monologue off of a paper. He keeps looking down, like he is at an auditioning. Then why are we filming him? Just add him as a voice over.

Probably don’t want to watch this with your parents this Thanksgiving. They will think you are turkey brain on drugs. Also, who smokes like that?

The main character Herschell is like Elvis meets Peter Fonda. There are awesome cut scenes of him on a motorbike with a rock band wailing in the background. For a movie all about turkeys he has some big as chops on his face.

Blood Freak (1972) is only enjoyable for those who enjoy terrible stuff. The dialogue is hilarious and the only thing looser than the morals is the narrative which makes very little sense. However, like the trappings of many of these 70’s movies, the pacing is slow, the performances are less than stellar and the movie is plagued by audio and visual problems. At one point there is no dialogue for like 20 minutes just people yelling possibly squawking in agony (hilarious and painful). It has a quasi anti-chemical, anti-Vietnam message that heralds in the new wave of vegetarianism. At its most scathing it is a critique, where the turkey factory and the militaristic compound are not much different. Truly bizarre with some laughs, not side splitting, like you ate too much Thanksgiving dinner.

Dinner is served! Watch the whole terrible movie here

Rating: Loon logo for rating Loon logo for rating/ 5
Length: 1h 26m
Rated:
Best time to watch: Watch during the day, this movie is like tryptophan and you pass out. Especially after a big turkey dinner.

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